While I’ll never know if he was being honest or not, I think I’m starting to feel what Army Spy said about needing time alone to figure shit out. I went on one date last week, and it was perfectly pleasant, but I felt and feel nothing. As all these other areas of my life are beginning to demand my attention and involvement, I’m realizing romance is currently pretty low on my priority list. And for the first time since downloading Tinder three years ago, I sincerely thought about getting rid of all of my dating apps. Which is especially scary for me because 1) I don’t really go out, and 2) when I do, my resting bitch face makes me wholly unapproachable.
At first, I was feeling anxious and a bit down about all this inner turmoil. But then I went to an event where I got my tarot cards, palm, and astrology chart read (laugh all you want) and IT ALL MAKES SENSE. My sense of transition and transformation were confirmed, as apparently I’m on the cusp of my Saturn Return (I need to delve deeper). I was also reassured that I will not be a spinster and that the love I find will be “worth the wait,” so I’m cool to chill for a sec.
The impulse to delete my remaining apps (Bumble, The League, the piece of shit we know as Hinge) has mellowed. I still might, but I’m less desperate to do it for the sake of doing something. For now, as I focus on other things, I’m taking a laissez-faire approach to love and dating, and it’s possible you won’t hear from me for an especially long while. However, I continue to be #opentolove and I still (and always have) encourage you to introduce me to your smart&funny man friends. Thanks in advance.